A Marriage and Family Law Attorney’s Guide to Custody for Unmarried Parents in La Jolla
When a relationship between unmarried parents ends, questions around custody, parenting time, and paternity rights can get complicated. Unmarried parents face different legal steps than married couples when it comes to establishing custody.
Amelia Mattis is a La Jolla-based marriage and family law attorney who focuses on custody issues in San Diego. At Mattis Law, A.P.C., we help unmarried parents protect their parental rights. Whether you’re trying to establish paternity, obtain custody rights, or resolve child support disputes, our goal is to give you clarity, legal protection, and peace of mind.
Do Unmarried Parents Have Custody Rights in California?
Yes, unmarried parents have custody rights, but they are not automatic. Unlike married parents, whose legal parentage is presumed at the child’s birth, unmarried parents must take legal steps to confirm parental status before custody and visitation rights can be enforced.
- For mothers, legal parent recognition typically begins at birth.
- For fathers, establishing paternity is required, either voluntarily or through court.
Without taking this legal step, a biological father does not have enforceable custody or visitation rights, even if they are active in the child’s life.
Why It’s Important to Establish Parentage
Before an unmarried father can seek custody or visitation, he must establish paternity; it’s the foundation for all future legal rights involving the child.
Two Ways to Establish Paternity:
- Voluntary Declaration of Parentage (VDOP)
This is a form both parents can sign confirming they are the child’s legal parents. This can happen at the hospital when the child is born, or you can do it later through a government agency. Once filed, it has the same legal effect as a court order. - Court-Ordered Paternity Testing
If paternity is disputed or the VDOP was never signed, either parent can ask the court to order DNA testing. Once confirmed, the court will issue a judgment of parentage.
Once paternity is legally established, the father becomes a legal parent, with the right to request custody, visitation, and access to school or medical records.
What Is Presumed Parent Status?
California Family Code §7611 outlines circumstances under which a person may be presumed to be a legal parent, even without biological proof.
Under this law, a person is considered a presumed parent if they:
- Received the child into their home and openly held the child out as their own
- Lived with the child and acted as a parent
- Were married to the child’s other parent at the time of birth or conception (limited to certain cases)
This law is especially important in cases involving:
- Same-sex parents
- Step-parents who took on a parenting role
- Biological fathers who never signed a declaration but acted as a parent for years
If you meet the standard of a presumed parent under Family Code §7611, you can seek custody and visitation, even if you were never married to the other parent or you weren’t listed on the child’s birth certificate.
Custody and Parenting Plan Options for Unmarried Parents
Once parentage is established, either parent can petition the court for custody orders, including:
- Legal custody – who has the right to make decisions about the child’s education, medical care, religion, and general welfare
- Physical custody – where the child lives most of the time
- Visitation (parenting time) – when the child spends time with the other parent
The court may grant:
- Joint legal custody, even if the child lives with one parent most of the time
- Sole physical custody to one parent, with scheduled visitation to the other
- 50/50 shared custody, if appropriate and in the child’s best interest
The final arrangement is written into a parenting plan, a court-approved schedule that outlines exchanges, holidays, and routines. If parents can agree on the terms, they can submit a plan jointly. If not, the court will decide based on the child’s needs.
Factors That Courts Considers in Unmarried Parent Custody Cases
San Diego Family Court focuses on the best interest of the child standard, looking at factors such as:
- Stability of each parent’s home
- Emotional bond between the child and each parent
- History of caregiving roles
- Ability of each parent to support the child’s health, education, and emotional needs
- Co-parenting ability and willingness to foster the child’s relationship with the other parent
- Any history of domestic violence, neglect, or substance abuse
The court does not automatically favor the mother or the parent who gave birth; once parentage is established, both parties are treated equally under the law.
What About Child Support?
Once paternity is confirmed, either parent can ask the court for child support. California uses a statewide formula that considers:
- Each parent’s income
- Time the child spends with each parent
- Health insurance costs
- Childcare expenses
Child support is legally enforceable, and back support may be owed dating back to the child’s birth if the non-custodial parent did not contribute financially. Establishing legal parent recognition is a prerequisite for ordering or enforcing child support.
Common Issues for Unmarried Parents
At Mattis Law, A.P.C., we frequently help parents resolve challenges unique to unmarried custody situations, such as:
- One parent refusing to sign a Voluntary Declaration of Parentage
- Disagreements over a child’s last name, school, or medical decisions
- Requests for relocation or move-away orders
- New relationships or cohabitation affecting the child’s living environment
- Fathers who are denied parenting time due to lack of court orders
- Mothers seeking support
- Parents who have concerns about shared custody requests
Why It’s Important to Legally Establish Parentage
Many unmarried parents agree on custody informally, but verbal agreements offer no legal protection if things change. Formalizing your custody and parenting plan through the court provides legal stability and enforcement options if needed.
If there isn’t a court order establishing parentage, the other parent could:
- Withhold the child from you
- Relocate with the child without consulting you
- Deny your access to medical or school records
- Change visitation schedules with no warning
Reasons to Choose Our Marriage and Family Law Firm
At Mattis Law, A.P.C., we offer real solutions, personalized attention, and clear guidance for our clients. If you are an unmarried parent, we can help you:
- File for paternity or respond to a paternity action
- Petition for custody, visitation, or child support
- Negotiate a parenting plan or prepare for court
- Understand your rights under Family Code §7611
- Modify existing orders if circumstances change
Attorney Amelia J. Mattis brings years of focused family law experience and a compassionate approach to every case. She has been named as a Top 10 Family Law Attorney in California by the American Institute of Family Law Attorneys.
Talk to a Custody Attorney in La Jolla Today
If you’re an unmarried parent in San Diego trying to understand your legal rights, or you’re facing a custody or support dispute, you don’t have to face the process alone.
Let Mattis Law, A.P.C. help you establish parentage, protect your role in your child’s life, and pursue a fair, secure custody arrangement that supports your child’s growth and stability.
Call (858) 328-4400 today for a free consultation, to get answers and support tailored to your situation.
We’re here to advocate for you and your family, every step of the way.