Divorce After Domestic Violence: A San Diego Survivor’s Legal Roadmap
Leaving an abusive relationship is one of the hardest decisions a person can make. If you’re considering divorce after domestic violence in San Diego, the legal path ahead may seem daunting, but you don’t have to face it alone.
At Mattis Law, A.P.C., we understand the emotional, physical, and legal difficulties survivors face when separating from an abusive spouse.
Step 1: Prioritizing Your Immediate Safety
Before taking any legal steps, it is vital to ensure your immediate safety and that of your children, if applicable. If you are in danger, do not wait—call 911 or go to a safe place such as a shelter or a trusted friend’s home.
You may also file for a restraining order in California, also known as a domestic violence restraining order (DVRO). This civil court order can:
- Prohibit the abuser from contacting or approaching you
- Remove the abuser from your shared home
- Award temporary custody of children to you
- Order the abuser to stay away from your workplace, school, or child’s school
A temporary DVRO can be issued quickly, usually the same day, and a hearing will be scheduled within 21 days to determine whether a long-term order (up to five years) should be granted.
Step 2: Choosing Between Divorce and Legal Separation
Survivors of domestic violence often ask whether to file for divorce or legal separation after domestic violence. Here are the key differences:
- Divorce legally ends the marriage. You and your spouse will no longer be legally tied, and all assets and responsibilities will be divided.
- Legal separation keeps the marriage legally intact but allows for court orders regarding finances, custody, and living arrangements.
Legal separation can be a stepping stone if you are not yet emotionally or financially ready for divorce, or if your religion or immigration status affects your decision.
At Mattis Law, A.P.C., we help domestic violence survivors choose the best option based on their individual needs and long-term goals.
Step 3: Filing for Divorce in San Diego Family Court
When you’re ready to proceed with divorce, your attorney will help you file a petition for dissolution of marriage in San Diego family court. California is a no-fault divorce state. This means you don’t need to prove abuse to obtain a divorce. But domestic violence can significantly impact issues like custody, spousal support, and property division.
When abuse is involved, the court will take steps to ensure:
- You do not have to appear in court with your abuser
- Protective measures are in place for your testimony
- Mediation is conducted separately or waived if it may endanger you
We understand that facing your abuser in court can be traumatizing. That’s why we advocate for court accommodations that prioritize your emotional well-being.
Step 4: Seeking Custody Protections for Your Children
One of the most difficult aspects of child custody after abuse is ensuring your children’s safety while navigating California’s family court process. The court’s primary concern is the best interests of the child, which includes protecting them from exposure to further harm.
California Family Code Section 3044 establishes a rebuttable presumption that awarding custody to a parent who has committed domestic violence within the last five years is not in the best interests of the child. This means:
- Your abuser may be denied custody unless they can prove it is safe and appropriate
- Supervised visitation may be ordered
- Parenting time may be limited or suspended
At Mattis Law, A.P.C., we help parents present the evidence necessary to protect their children, including police reports, medical records, witness statements, and restraining orders.
Step 5: Documenting and Present Evidence of Abuse
Even if you are not pursuing criminal charges, thorough documentation of the abuse is critical in family court. This includes:
- Police reports and emergency call logs
- Photos of injuries or property damage
- Medical records and mental health evaluations
- Witness statements from friends, neighbors, or coworkers
- Text messages, emails, or voicemails that show threats or harassment
We’ll help clients organize and present this evidence clearly and strategically, ensuring the court understands the full context of the abuse and its impact.
Step 6: Addressing Spousal Support and Property Division
Domestic violence can influence decisions about spousal support (also known as alimony) in California. Courts may deny spousal support to an abusive spouse under Family Code Section 4320(i) and (m), especially if there is a conviction or restraining order in place.
The abuse survivor may be awarded support, particularly if the abuse caused financial hardship, isolation from employment, or long-term trauma.
When dividing property, the court seeks fairness. But if your spouse used coercion, threats, or physical violence to control finances, we can present that information as part of your case for a more favorable distribution.
Step 7: Considering Long-Term Protection and Healing
While legal outcomes are critical, survivors of domestic violence also need ongoing emotional support. We work with clients to develop post-divorce safety plans and refer them to community resources, including:
- Counseling and support groups
- Emergency housing and transitional programs
- Victim advocacy organizations
- Mental health services for children
Your safety and healing are as important as your legal case. We make sure you feel supported throughout the process and long after the final court order is signed.
Reasons to Choose Mattis Law, A.P.C.?
Amelia J. Mattis is not just an attorney—she is a fierce advocate for survivors. Amelia has been recognized as one of San Diego’s Rising Stars by Super Lawyers, and she was also selected as a Top 10 Family Law Attorney by Attorney and Practice Magazine.
When you choose Mattis Law, A.P.C., you get:
- One-on-one support with a dedicated attorney
- Deep experience with domestic violence-related divorces
- Protective strategies tailored to your unique situation
- Skilled courtroom representation and negotiation
- Clear, honest communication every step of the way
You are not just another case. You are a person who deserves safety, justice, and peace of mind—and that is exactly what we fight for.
Talk to an Experienced Divorce and Family Law Attorney in San Diego
If you are thinking about divorce after domestic violence, the sooner you act, the more options you will have to protect yourself and your children. Let our San Diego domestic violence family law lawyer help you move from fear to freedom—one step at a time.
Call Mattis Law, A.P.C., at (858) 328-4400 to schedule your free consultation.